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There’s a dance in the dark


So saluting the bourgeois in my hat and I keep having dreams of an infant Issac as a boy taking him to Long johns silver as if I were his caretaker and protector. I used to spend all my allowance and let him keep it and send him stuff like Jewelry and paintings.

I want to talk about life and fear when I wake up a sense a feeling of fear irrationally maybe I’m scared of failing the legal work, work undone makes me feel paranoid.

And about Dexter s lookalike it’s uncertain I worry when e leaves

The sleep is never ending and Long and scary when u wake up it might. Be the batman drug working in the quietiapine. Why are dead boys and girls dreaming of me.

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With Dexter dead


Someone said he’s gonna be proud of u, from his deathbed

And that he’s just a copy, but copies mean alot to me. But Dexter will just be annoyed next time when I raise it up to him. Since I’ve picked a mate we should be loyal and faithful to our vows. Till death do us part

Beyond Dexter there’s still a lot of wars to fight. I thought getting my money back was all I wanted or willed cause I was poor, now moneys like rubbles cashless and poor.

I thought being a lawyer was everything I had to accomplish and studying to be a doctor

But it’s meaningless after a while

I thought writing all the songs in the world would ease my mind but it’s just another song that melody fades.

I feel like I’m in a bad dream that doesn’t end. At first I was fighting…

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well last night people sorta claimed they saw the dead coming back to life underground when it was a new population hiding underground and that sorta triggered an emotion. wishing dexter was back, wishing the scientist was back, even wishing grandpa was back with us. i wrote alot of shite to the doctor and i kinda regretted it. =–According to grandpa’s instructions to reveal stuff about what species of human i was. And that i turned into animals. I dont’ know if he’s schizoprenic about it, but undoubtedly its true, but who would insanely believe my story. So i wrote it was a dream.


i kinda miss talking to my friends, online. their all dead now, and i find that doubtful i can write to anyone who’ll understand how i feel. its the scientfic age where regretably all my grandparents who were creatures but loved me were locked up in one spot and left to die. im sad my family is dying but excited about living alone and trying a new life working from home office. its gonna be a trial, im excited but feeling eccentric and wanna just feel safe and live off my basic allowance and do nothing about it sometimes, but i know working is for the best.

grandpa’s leaving

they’ve finally shot them all dead and he’s not returning tmr. :{ whos’ gonna watch over my shoulder. i felt bad for leaving him for awhile to go to another neighborhood to get my quessidella. i feel alittle destitute, dad’s been shouting alot. their insisting i get my teeth checked at the polyclinic dentist. for an extraction, then i’d really not be able to eat.

grandpa’s really good for company after a long day he’s right there for me.

starvexed lovers and blank space

Stuff’d outlet  at nex mall only opens at 10.30am, im starving for a chicken quesidella. i feel like emptying my shelf full of books typing them online, especially the law ones, but that may not help me understand how to be a better paralegal. i don’t know im confused. im tired of being confined, but saying bye bye eternally to uncle dexter who’s gonna be shot tmr is hard. ive been confined at home for a year now, not going out because people felt unsafe. listening to taylor swifts love songs, makes me feel vexed about  my love life. i wonder if someone had already dragged him away before i noticed he was gone or he was back and replaced, i geniunely feel troubled about my love life. people (who are definitely gonna end up raped) tell me to not take him seriously, and see other guys.

People say guys with money are a better deal. but im so vexed when they say that. how do you know when you’re getting together with a person forever and ur willing to wait billions of years to see him again. or 50 lifetimes. there’s so many questions i want to ask him like i’d like to get an answer now.

medical dream come true

well sometime ago in 2011 i came to be in existence again in the world, we had just returned from the war fleet guarding spaces across the moon. i was given a foster home and a foster name and didnt dare tell the doctor i was seeing for our depot injection where i came from or that i was american russian. And after experiencing life at the hospital i was very keen on working in the hospital as one of them, i have an education qualification in medicine and law and engineering. i didnt know how to approach the doctor to tell him to check my records as the army didnt send them my records and died.

so i recently decided to talk to the doctors at imh about it via email and i had to prove as im an immortal i first became invited to work at the hospital in 1910 that seemed very hard an idea to impose but i tried it. and the doctors found my records in cambridge and oxford. and im gonna be taught to be a doctor again! this time im gonna specialize as a psychiatrist/ in a 1000 years time. its definitely not a long wait for me as ten years have already gone by living here. i’ll be starting work on my law firm here first in hundred years. my family sadly might not grow old enough to see that happen and i am to live alone just down the street. i feel this is really truly a blessing. life seemed so difficult 10 years ago dealing with enemies and my parents always encouraging me to attend occupational therapy at the hospital as if i were an invalid. But i was praying and wishing at the fountain that god would end this war and i’d get to live alone and be a doctor and lawyer. i think prayer works. and talking to people about what u wish for. it was very touching that my original doctor faced a difficult situation like us too at the beginning.

when i knew nothing about what was happening in singapore and the situation people were in, i just ducked over and helped pull people out of trouble and protect young kids. now im happy i didnt even expect to use a computer ever again but a fortunate pass from my friend and uncle led me to have a new phone and computer cause i did them favours. always helping a failing friend always helps and is a courtesy i realized. i also realized i’ll miss my family, my dad works hard to make furniture fit in my room and helped me laminate my table with a pink paper so i could be comfortable using the computer. my mom cracks jokes to keep me occupied and grandpa dexter is always there to lend a helping hand.

i think with a willing heart to serve and earning a good soul god will hear our prayers and cries at night and fulfill our every wish. thank you for listening and may god bless you.